Wednesday, October 31, 2012

The Headland Observer

Ancient Clinic Discovered

 Archaeologists Saturday unearthed a medical temple dating back to the Mayoan era.
"It's quite a find," said Bill Johnson, head archeologist. "It’s rare to see something this well preserved."
The structure’s near-perfect condition is probably due to the sterile environment kept by the Mayoan priests. 
Among the findings, Johnson's favorite is an oddly shaped device inscribed with the words, "fax machine: for internal use only."
"We found it against the wall in an ante room," he said, “so it’s clear that the clinic slaves, or ‘employees,’ were not allowed to use it.”
Hieroglyphic markings indicate that it was used as a vessel for prayer to their gods via parchment, which was placed on an upright tray and sent into the afterlife by punching a code into the numerical keypad. 
Johnson also found what appeared to be a white ceremonial gown adorned with a pronged necklace. "I have no idea what this was for," Johnson laughed. He then stuck the prongs into his ears and held up the other end. "I'm going to listen to your heart,” he joked.

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